Tag Archives: reflection

PREFACE

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The purpose of the work is to lead the soul to the summit of spiritual perfection, by means of a constant, courageous struggle against our evil nature, which tends to keep us away from that goal. [SC 1]

The key word, years ago, would have been evil.

Today, a sign of changes brought about in twenty years of growth, I focus on courageous.

Growth tends to imply improvement.  It’s tempting to pat myself on the back…however evil I might have been long ago, I am now less evil…new and improved.

Instead, I find myself caught in an eternal whirlpool of good and evil, the eddy alternately capturing and releasing me, generating moments of growth that are too often sacrificed in an unexpected meeting with demons and temptations I thought I had slain.

Evil…the great Leviathan…is never far away.  In fact, growth, such as it has been for me, reveals that Leviathan is always at hand…not out there…but in here…in my spirit.  No wonder the struggle seems endless…eternal.

The worst part of the battle is the temptation to cede to evil.  Leviathan offers enticing options.  Pride – I have come so far, I’m better than I was yesterday.  Sloth – I’ll worry about this tomorrow.  Despair – Nothing I do will matter anyway.  Lies – After all, it’s not that big of a deal.

At one time or another, I have used every option on Leviathan’s list.  Of late, I am caught in the snag of despair.  When will I ever conquer my anger?  Be generous with forgiveness?  Be fittingly grateful?  I slay one evil, only to turn and face two more.  The struggle is endless.

Thus, I am caught by the word courageous.  The key.   

The saints agree.  The human struggle is within us, in each of us, an ever-present fight to choose the good, the righteous, the true…to choose love.  The greater love.  God’s love.

We fight, we win, we fall back, we confess, we repent, and we begin again.  Choosing to stay in the battle…that is the key.  Courage.  To stay in the battle…The Spiritual Combat.  If I can’t always win, at least I can be courageous.  

God’s love is our companion.  God’s love is the prize.

 

PRAYER:     God, let me rely on your promises and your love to give me strength…and courage…in The Spiritual Combat.

 SCRIPTURE:  …that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith; that you, being rooted and grounded in love, may have power to comprehend with all the saints what is the breadth and length and height and depth, and to know the love of Christ which surpasses knowledge, that you may be filled with all the fullness of God.  [Eph 1:17-19]

 

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3. Trust in God

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…contemplate with an ardent faith the immense power and infinite wisdom of the Supreme Being…Balancing what we fear from ourselves with what we hope from God, we shall courageously undergo the greatest difficulties and severest trials.  Joining these weapons to prayer, as we shall see later, we shall be able to execute the greatest plans and gain decisive victories.  (SC 9-10, Chapter 3)

God’s gift of humility…an open door for God…

As a concept, we have no problem in embracing humility.  In practice?  Well, that is quite another matter.

Humility?  My first tendency is to compare myself with others.  And who do I choose for my comparison?  I conjure up painful experiences with arrogant, abusive, dismissive blowhards and count myself better than they.  Humble?

Challenges?  I think of God, of His love, His truth, His power.  How many disputes have I set for myself to solve, gathering all my resources and planning my strategies and arguments?  When I find time, I will talk with God…if there is time.  Humble?

Prayer?  I make a plan to read the Gospels…later…when I can find the time.  I receive God’s love in brief reflective moments.  Then I get busy.  I tackle the daily task at hand, following my own plans, using my own intellect and exerting my own power to make it all come together.  Humble?

Then…what frustration grips my spirit when the task at hand falls apart!  I redouble my efforts.  I Google for new information.  I accuse people who thwarted my plan.  Humble?

Where is God in my life?  I put Him high on a shelf and tell Him I will get back to Him later…when I have time.  On an intellectual level, I know God is Supreme.  But in my life, He has become an afterthought.

Many are the plans in the mind of a man, but it is the purpose of the Lord that will be established. [Prov 19:21]

I want to hold onto two things that are irreconcilable.  I want to control my life.  And I want God to help me control my life.  I cannot both hold the reins of my life and let God hold the same reins.

Without humility, I will hold onto the reins for dear life.  The door meant for God to enter is closed.  Humility is the measure of where I place my trust.  Do I trust God enough to let go?

Let go?  Only if I am humble enough to let God be God.  Supreme.  All-powerful.  All-loving.

Question:  Today, Lord, what plans have I laid that have not yet been submitted to You?

PRAYER: 

God, with true distrust in myself and complete trust in You, help me in true humility to release my ego and grab onto Your hand.

 SCRIPTURE: 

“O Lord, God of our fathers, art thou not God in heaven? Dost thou not rule over all the kingdoms of the nations? In thy hand are power and might, so that none is able to withstand thee.”  [Jehoshaphat’s Prayer, Phil 3:7-9]

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2. Distrust of Self

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…although in ourselves we are nothing, we are too apt to overestimate our own abilities and to conclude falsely that we are of some importance.  This vice springs from the corruption of our nature.  But the more natural a thing is, the more difficult it is to be discovered. (SC 6-7, Chapter 2)

It is not a message to warm the souls of people these days.  Distrust thyself?

In fact, modern mega-churches seem built today for the express purpose of teaching us that we indeed are mega-strong…all-powerful, all capable.  We not only can “do it.”  We can do it ALL.  This weekly message from the pulpit meets a deep human need, a godly hand-up offered to encourage us and pull us out of despair and discouragement.

But the message, lacking a godly foundation, is a false promise and a boastful claim.  So what is this foundation we need?

Following the plans of the Architect of our life, we must build the structure of our life from the ground up.  We must first meditate upon our own weakness.  Consider the fact that, being nothing in ourselves, we cannot without Divine assistance, accomplish the smallest good or advance the smallest step towards Heaven.[i]

We are not the foundation of our success.  There is a reason that pride is named as the Father of all Sins, a reason why all human virtues are fueled with humility.

God is not going to fight us for His right to guide us.  If we are secure in our own power and wisdom, He will not interfere.  He comes to our aid only by invitation.

We must open the door for God.  We must bend a knee and entreat Him.  And His presence in our heart is not for the purpose of celebrating our human strength.  He is there to guide, teach, heal, correct, forgive, and love.

God’s power in our life is both the foundation and the summit of any strength we might have.  But His strength will only fuel our life in the absence of our own prideful claim to personal power.

Humility empties a space in our soul for God to enter.  We are weak.  We are prone to sin.  We are sons and daughters of Adam and Eve.  This distrust of our own strength is a gift from Heaven, bestowed by God on those He loves.[ii]

When we wake one morning and are struck by our weakness, our failures, and our sins, there is no need to give up.  Bend a knee.  And give thanks to God.

God’s gift of humility is the foundation we need to be truly strong, a strength sent from above into a heart that has opened the door and made space.

Question:  Today, Lord, what have I done to take control away from You?

PRAYER: 

God, enlighten me that I may see myself as You see me and to celebrate Your wisdom and love that helps me grow in holiness and trust in You.

 SCRIPTURE: 

But whatever gain I had, I counted as loss for the sake of Christ.  Indeed I count everything as loss because of the surpassing worth of knowing Christ Jesus my Lord.  For his sake I have suffered the loss of all things, and count them as refuse, in order that I may gain Christ and be found in him…  [Phil 3:7-9]

i.  SC 7
ii. SC 7

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1. Path of Perfection

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But remember that as no war can be carried on with greater fierceness, the forces, no other than ourselves, being equal on both sides, so the victory when gained is most pleasing to God and most glorious to the conqueror.  (SC 5 Chapter 1)

When the new week dawns, I will meet with attorneys to outline the course of our battle ahead.

This is not the first time a conflict has required consult and enlistment of forces.  No matter how many laws exist to define justice, man has no limits to the ways he might cheat, lie, and assault.

On the other side of the world, battle lines are drawn not with lawyers, but with swords, tanks, and poison gas.  Another battle over property, but the stakes are life-threatening.

Battles, pitting good guy against bad, trace their existence back to Cain and Abel.  An enemy, the fight, the roar and clash of swords until…a winner is declared.

What kind of battle is this, The Spiritual Combat?  I am both the enemy and comrade, wielding sword against sword, my right hand versus my left.  I turn right, then left, defending…then attacking…all against myself.

The source of conflict?  The law under siege?

The law of Love.  God’s command, His entreaty.  Love one another as I have loved you.  Love your enemies as yourself.  I look for an exception.  Even one.  How could God expect me to love the man who flies the plane delivering bombs?

The battle against my brother is, above all else, a battle fought inside myself, a heart divided…my heart…one soul, but two hearts in need of conversion.

Question:  What is the barrier to loving my enemy?

PRAYER: 

God, help me to see my enemy through Your eyes, his Creator, and to know Your love that fills and covers each of us.

 SCRIPTURE: 

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven; for he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.  [Mat 5:43-45]

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